likesunday

The cost of truth in advertising

[Thanks, Ian, for picture!]

In all honesty, the Bible is no more or less violent (or objectionable) than the writings of other World religions. Or mythologies (I tend to view as one and the same). We just always seem to give this particular book a pass.

Scratch that- the book is just fine. It's the ensuing actions of many Believers (I Say-Uh, You-uh have-uh been HEALED-dah) that is stomach-turning. Many messages are pure and good in this collection of writings; however, so much is concentrated on the negative. "Passion of the Christ" is a fantastic example of glancing off a man's (he, or He if you prefer, at least has record of existing- Blame the Council of Nicea for his God-hood) loving, peaceful message in favour of focusing on the most traumatic, violent, hurting, self-doubting moment of his life. Spreading the Word through FEAR and agony.

This is why I understand Judaeism (base concepts, have studied bits but there's a whole lot of tradition I don't know) better than its newer, perhaps unwanted, sidekick. And have you ever had one of your Jewish friends passionately try and convert you? Exactly. A certain sense of security exists. Christians sometimes seem unnaturally insecure with those who Must preach, who Must have everyone pray their way in public institutions/courthouses/ballparks, who Must Not concede to "Happy Holidays" less the Biblical story of a 'fat man who lives with little people who make toys he uses to entice children to believe in him' forever be lost (how about You say "Merry Christmas", whomever responds back says whichever they mean most??), who Must Not share publicly displayed monogamous unities with "those Homo-Sexuals"...and Heavens Forbid they Must protect the children from Harry Potter books or they'll all turn into witches! I wish any of that was made up, truly, but pick a Bill O'Reilly show on any given day in a December and you may just see all 4. Points for consistancy, I suppose.

I veer towards Buddhism in my philosophical approach, but I always wanted (want) the Greek and Roman dieties to be real. If translated by men, why wouldn't these stories (er, historical renderings) be fraught with human foibles- murderous jealousy, sexual weaknesses, youthful uprisings (not necessarily in that order)? These were gods easily understood. The rules were clear (if unfair). The tales of the Pantheon still crop up in following generations ('forsooth', I dare say Shakespeare would have been bleak without its influence). I am not sure why I am more inspired by the petty desires of these guys than the angry/jealous/wrathful OT/NT version of the archetype, but if forced I think I'd point to one key element of the Greek and Roman writings that the Biblical teachings sorely lack (for all the stereo-typing of a certain sect of followers):

Humour.

Back in '04

I just found this gem roaming the 'internets' tonight:

Classic. [from a Christian Reverand's website...Probably a good one, I didn't see a Falwellism once on his site]

Hot & Bothered.

For no damn good reason other than I'm a real mood for kvetching, I present to you my Top Ten Things That Currently Bug Me:

1. Cliched use of natal analogies.

First it was 'birthing pains of Democracy' (I don't remember my son's birth hurting like the deaths of 50-100 civilians a DAY does). Now, unbeknownst to anyone with a pulse (or is that a brain scan), New Orleans is experiencing a spectacular 'Rebirth'. Really. Was it the 800.00 a month insurance costs for a 500k home (private, most insurers won't cover now), the 65% debris and sludge yet to be cleaned up, or the mass exodus of citizens with few who have returned that is the tip-off of such a grand re-awakening? Or did the bodies still being recovered do it for him?

    2.  Daily American soldier and civilian Iraqi deaths not even making front page news anymore.

Either the liberal conspiring media is asleep at the wheel, or something a bit more true is at work- the apathy of Amer-ih-cuhns is so damn complete even War doesn't sell.

    3.  Media Standards.

Cite point 2 above, add a dose of Karr and a dash of washroom conversation and you'll see what I mean.

    4.  Hawaiian shirt Fridays.

If you're wardrobe is so stricken by golf shirts and other business casual ware that wearing a shirt with flowers or palm trees breaks the monotony and makes you feel like you have a voice again, more power to you. Don't just all of you do it on the same damn day. Kinda negates the originality and fun factor, folks.

[What, you thought this was just going to be about hurricanes and cluster bombs?]

    5.  Sanctimonious Assholes.

So, sure, given, right? Recent example: I take my toddler on my own to Village Inn, figuring a meltdown there would be less invasive than say, establishments with table cloths and linen napkins. As it happens, said toddler does indeed meltdown, when after a madcap and zany episode of crayon, sugar packet, and jelly tossing, he is punished by having his cherished Binky ("Bink-KHEE" in toddler) taken away. This results in a rash of wails, so we take a trip for a moment to the outside atrium so he could fully appreciate the gravity of the situation. As I am carrying him away, a lady at an adjacent table murmurs to husband and 3-4yr old, "What is she doing to her kid?"

Backstory: 10 minutes before, this mom and dad were asking their daughter if she wanted Fruit, or FRENCH FRIES. I emphasize this way because that is exactly how this little girl was pitched. One- sell up the fruit. Two- even better, how about You decide what's best for your child to eat instead of dreamily expecting them to make these decisions and not end up with problems?

So, I seethed, and now I release to you, dear readers, secure in my own sanctimonious knowledge that discipline trumps nutrition-threatening lassitude. 

   6.   Stolen Applause.

Just that. Those who deserve tributes should receive. Those that receive should acknowledge. Just sayin'.

   7.  Public Gymnasiums.

I began the trek back to physical fitness last night, dusting off the old membership and joining forces with a friend. It was fine, I feel good- but the dread is there. The 'oh boy, there are only 20 treadmills and 19 are occupied and I see 3 others heading in the same direction and do I be nice or do I throw a shoulder into it' internal dialogues that start with treadmills, move on to ellipticals, show again at leg machines, and finally ease off with a completely clear stretching/ab mat. Bleh.

    8.  Okay, back to what you'd expect- Civil War Denials.

Allawi- "Stage one of Civil War". CIA Analysts, allegedly, Civil War. Sen. John Warner, chairman of Armed Services Committee, "all out Civil War". Gen. John Abizaid, Head of Central Command, "I believe that the sectarian violence is probably as bad as I've seen it, in Baghdad in particular, and that if not stopped it is possible that Iraq could move toward civil war".

So, what part of 'sitting ducks in crossfire' is confusing to our leaders?

    9.  Qwest.

This company makes the list due to the dazzling 250mbps download speed they provide. No, nix that- this makes the list due to the fact that when I lived two blocks over I had a 1.5mbps download speed...for $10 less a month. I am told I should 'check back monthly' for service area statuses.

So if you ever wondered why I never viewed those videos you sent, or why I, unlike the rest of web-enlightened peers, have not caught YouTube fever- now you know.

    10.   Religious Nut-bags.

Don't think that one requires any elaboration.

What's bothering You these days?

Cap'n Obvious in da House

Well, blimey, it must be so now- Pat Roberston a 'Global Warming convert'. Glad to have ya on board, Pat. Just the right note of credibility we were lacking up to now.

In other news from the World of D'uh, top generals admit Civil War in Iraq is a definite possibility. Uh, exactly how many daily suicide bombings and other Sunni on Shi'ite on Sunni on Shi'ite killings have to occur before that reality is official to them?

The termites are in charge...

Pat Robertson yesterday declared a Jihad on the Venezuelan President, but it's all right, he apologized:

Conservative U.S. evangelist Pat Robertson, who called for the assassination of Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez, said on Wednesday he was misinterpreted and there were a number of ways to "take him out" including kidnapping.

"I said our special forces could take him out. Take him out could be a number of things including kidnapping," Robertson said on his "The 700 Club" television program.

"There are a number of ways of taking out a dictator from power besides killing him. I was misinterpreted," Robertson added.

See, the way to apologize is to replace the initial threat with another, slightly less dire, one. Like, "I am not going to divorce you, I'm just going to start fucking around on you. There- don't you feel better?".

Robertson always has had a way with words. Ignorance is not only bliss, it's homophobic, misogynistic, devolving, hate-mongering Heaven.

Since I haven't posted in a week- from the mailbag:

Why George & Dragon is the place to be in Phoenix on Thursday nights.

Please welcome kindly LeftyBlogs to the web space. I'm flattered- of 600 sites indexed, my humble effort is included (under Arizona).

My new 'few minutes a week' hobby. Note the flag, selah.

Why I Love Bill

I won't link them, but the American Family Association is all up in arms because Bill Maher, as usual, calls it as he sees it. The offending transcript [from Bartcop, who I'll happily link all day long]:

We are a nation that is unenlightened because of religion…I think that religion stops people from thinking. I think it justifies crazies. I think that flying planes in a building was a faith-based initiative. I think religion is a neurological disorder. If you look at it logically, it's something that was drilled into your head when you were a small child."
                   
"When you look at belief in such things--as do you go to heaven, is there a devil--we have more in common with (Muslin countries) Turkey and Iran and Syria than we do with European nations and Canada and nations that, yes, I would consider more enlightened that us."
       
Maher said he wasn't speaking only of evangelicals, but included all religious people. He said he agreed with Jesse Ventura "who had that quote about religion is a crutch for weak-minded people who need strength in numbers."
       
Because of their neurological disorder, he said Christians "do not believe in science and rationality." He went on to say the future does not belong to religion. One recalls the famous quote from the Beatles in the 60's that they "were more popular than Jesus."
       
        According to Maher, the Bible is a book of fairy tales, calling the account of Jonah a fairy tale the same as Jack in the Beanstalk .

I keep hearing how Liberalism is a 'mental disease', yet many of the precepts Liberals champion are in alignment with the words in the Bible attributed to the prophet Jesus Christ. What Bible chapter exactly does torture, corporate greed, the eradication of help for the sick and poor, and environmental destruction come into play as precepts of His, I wonder?

I think the need for religion is biologically imprinted in Humans, so choose your poison, but it's the bleeding hypocrisy of these 'super-Christians' that makes my toes curl and my stomach turn.

I don't believe there can be any such thing as a Good Christian and a Staunch Republican (making the differentiation here from 'Conservative', as there are plenty of Dems that are fiscally so and other that don't subscribe to all the current sickness of the GOP)- the tenets of the latter negate the requirements of the former.

Beuhller? Beuhller?

This article on the discernable lack of outcry from the Muslim community worldwide for what happened last week in Fallujah brings home how...under-appreciated U.S. presence in Iraq is.

Our soldiers are tasked with a Hell of an uphill battle; history has shown, over and over and over again, that when people fight for their God/s, many many people die. You can't reason with fanatics, because they have no reason to appeal to- what recourse is one left with?

Many more awful (can't fathom what family members could have felt seeing that video footage- blinding rage, I'd think) scenes like we've just witnessed, and it will really boil down to 2 scenarios. We pull out faster than an eighteen yr. old boy on Prom night, or we say fuck it and go balls out on the country. Yea, we went in under...less substantiated reasoning (understatement) than we should of- but we've also done a pretty good job of limiting civilian casualties and dumping billions of aid (that, incidentally, programs in our own country could put to good use- as taxpayers and citizens) into public works programs (clumsily, admittedly, but...), schools, rebuilding structures.

So, reward the cities that show outward support, or at the very least those that don't think pouring oil on freshly car-bombed U.S. civilians and lighting them on fire while hacking away at their limbs and stringing up what's left on electrical wires is an acceptable practice. Make sure their buildings, schools, mosques are attended to most, their civilians protected first. Those that do engage in Somalia-like demonstrations of Sunni Triangle solidarity?

Fuck 'em. Lay siege. Destroy the water and power sources. Surround the town so no supplies get in. Bomb at regular intervals just to keep it interesting. See how long until they're gasping how Allah has forsaken them and they crawl out begging the Americans to have mercy.

And for Pete's sake stop the illusion that this war is over and won- because we are far from being able to declare victory.

And people say all Democrats are passive- the Hell, you say.